Have you been feeling that 2016 has been an incredibly and extremely challenging year for you? I’m not talking about the countless number of celebrity deaths that we’ve experienced this past year, albeit some were a complete surprise and have truly left a void in this world. I’m talking about the challenges that we’ve each faced in our daily lives throughout the year. Please believe me when I say that you’re not alone. I’ve seen more relationship breakups (including one of my own), economic hardships and general turmoil throughout the world this year than I’ve ever seen before. My reflections for 2016 have given me some incredible gifts in my own personal growth.
For myself, I’ve had many lessons to learn this year and I’ve grown in leaps and bounds. My own first challenge was in February when I moved from a place I had been living in since May of 2007. This was the place I had come to know and called my ‘home’ for almost the past 9 years after moving out of my parent’s place. It’s been the place where I’ve had some major accomplishments in my life as well as some setbacks. I had a major relationship breakup after 3 years that took me into the depths of depression where I faced the dark demons of suicide. I also found my solace when I bought my guitar, which has now become my purpose and my passion. On the final day, when I had handed over the keys back to my landlord, I finally broke down and I cried. For me, it was the end of an era in my life. Understanding now that 2016 is the ‘9 Year of Completion’ energy, this was only the beginning of many lessons to be learned – some were, unfortunately, more difficult than others.
After moving out, I had moved into a condo with my then partner. After only 4 short months, this relationship also came to an end. I had finally learned to stand up for myself in a relationship and to adhere to my own foundational agreements (more can be read about my experiences in my post titled Emotional Abuse: The Dark Side of Toxic & Negative Relationships). This was one of my biggest lessons and challenges for this year. It’s said that the universe will first throw a pebble, then a rock, and finally a brick in our direction for lessons that need to be learned. I think I can safely say that I got the brick on this one, especially given the fact that it was our third attempt at being together. I loved this person deeply; we had an inexplicable connection through music and one that I had never encountered before with anyone – music spoke for us when words had failed. Ultimately, though, I knew it was the best decision for me as I had become an empty shell in the relationship, and was no longer able to distinguish the blurred lines of where my partner ended and I began; it was the very essence of a co-dependent relationship. Learning to set boundaries was another major part of this relationship that ended. As I’ve heard it said, “You grow through what you go through”.
After packing up and moving out of the condo in a matter of only 4 hours, I moved into a temporary living arrangement with family for 3 months. In October, I once again moved into a place that allows me to have the space to practice guitar, workout, and host gatherings with family/friends. I have to wonder: if moving 3 times, all within the span of the same year, if I can be considered a nomad? lol 😛
Throughout October and November, I’ve been faced with even more lessons. Some big lessons came through facing my fear of failure (more can be read about it in my post titled Facing Your Fears: Winning the Battle for Your Subconscious Mind). I’ve also learned to start calling people out on their behaviors and treatment of others, especially on how I’m treated. As can be expected, those people I called out didn’t like it and some took offense; they have their own lessons to learn in their growth journey. That which frustrates us about others also exists within ourselves – we are mirrors for each other to learn from should we be willing to look at the mirror presented to us, see the lesson, heal, and grow from it.
For my romantic relationship world, I’ve seen that online dating isn’t for me, as a lot of them in my past had begun from the ever growing online dating realm. While I’m not saying that online dating doesn’t work, as I’ve heard many success stories of people meeting and having a successful relationship, I’ve just come to realize that it may not work for me. The energy of online dating for me is that a person is ‘hunting’ for the ‘right one’, and ‘hunting’ for something you desire can oftentimes actually push it further away from you. I know there is someone out there who is the ‘right one’ for me; whether I’ve met her already or have yet to meet her is unknown to me. What I do know is that she is out there, somewhere, seeking me and that we will find each other when we both least expect it – for as Rumi says, “What you seek is also seeking you”.
Some of the best accomplishments and memories I’ve had for 2016 include:
- Completing a full round each from start to finish of P90X3 and 22 Minute Hard Corps
- Attending the Juno Awards in April
- My first ever busking experience (on YouTube)
- Having a band called The Wild, Tweet to me requesting a video of their song I was learning (on YouTube)
- Seeing a Canadian rock band called Diemonds perform twice & have a photo taken with the lead vocalist
- Visiting the National Music Center in Calgary the day of their grand opening
- Seeing another band called The Lazys perform & have a photo taken with the entire band
- Volunteering as an usher for an Alice Cooper concert
- Being asked the honor to be the MC for my sister’s wedding (which I gladly accepted)
- Many good times with family & friends
Some game changers for me this year were:
- A car crash to begin the new year & $3500 worth of damages – the other driver paid for everything
- Relationship breakup & moving
- Leadership courses I was attempting to bring to my city after a long hiatus
I spent much of the year focusing on pleasing others and taking on more/saying “yes” when I meant “no” while forgetting about myself and what I needed.
As 2016 quickly comes to a close, I can see the gifts in each lesson I’ve learned throughout this year. For those who’ve given me the gifts of the lessons, I offer my humblest gratitude, love, and forgiveness for being the ones to bring them into my life. My higher being guided you into my life so that I may learn and grow into Who I Really Am. For those who’ve stood by my side, supported me when I needed it the most, and offered their love, again I offer my deepest love and gratitude for being in my life and part of my life. For those whom I’ve newly met this year, you’ve come into my life for a reason as our energy has attracted us together. As it’s said, your vibe attracts your tribe, and I’m truly grateful to have you as part of my tribe.
For me, I’ve decided that 2017 will be magical, filled with new adventures, beginnings, and creations. My main goal is to play in Nashville!! Please check out my GoFundMe page & help support me in my dream 🙂 What lessons have you learned this year and what will your 2017 look like for you?
Peace, Love, Light and Many Blessings to you all, and all the best to an awesome 2017. Happy New Year & Rock On!!!!